Rrrrrroute Rrrrrrecalculation!

Woo hoo!  I am now gadgetly fulfilled!  I bought a GPS navigation thingy from ebay.  It's a cheap knockoff but it works wonderfully.  I pathetically use it to tell me how to get to the local shops, despite having done the trip thousands of times over the 15 years I've lived in this neighbourhood.

I can choose which accent I would like to have the voice directions in.  The english language choices for the I-GO map system are an American bloke, a posh British bloke, or a British woman.  The posh British bloke sounds like I have Prince Charles,  in my car, fallen on hard times and doing his day job.  He rolls his 'r's' when he says 'rrrrroute rrrrecalculation!' The British woman just sounds bored and I wouldn't be surprised if she fell asleep on the job and I'd end up at Ayers Rock because she never told me to 'turn left at the next junction'.

I noticed that there's no Aussie accent to choose from.  I'm picturing what the instructions from an Aussie bloke on a GPS system would be like.  Here's a few examples:

"Hey mate, turn left mate, yeah, that's right mate - bloody awesome"

"Ya prick, ya missed the f*ckin' turn - where'd ya get ya licence from - a Weetbix packet? ...root recalculay-shun"

"Warning - pub on next corner - turn in to the right...root recalculay-shun"

"Just like a f*ckin woman, missed the turn - go back for beer...root recalculay-shun"

"Warning - you are exceeding the speed limit - but not by enough - go faster ya bloody woozer"

I guess the makers of the GPS were wise not to include an Aussie bloke in the voice direction choices after all...